Friday, June 29, 2007

My first blog entry.... we are on the cusp of either some great writing or complete garbage that I will forget a week from now. My very first blog post. Kind of daunting to be honest with you. Like the promise of a shiny new coloring book. Will the art inside be beautiful and crisp upon completion, or will it look like the result of an angry toddler on a sugar bender.
So the question is, what should this historic first post contain? A movie review? A rant of some kind? A laundry list of what I had to eat today? Maybe lurid tales of hard core sex?

With that kind of build up, I'm starting to think I shouldn't post anything at all. I mean, how could it possibly live up to the scrutiny? But then, what would be the point of this entire endeavor?

Let's start with a history of Kris. Kind of a get to know you sort of thing. In bullet point form, if for no other reason than because I'm sick of typing in complete sentences.

  • Born at the beginning of that horrible decade known as the 80s. Not that the 90s were much better. Maybe I'll start telling people I'm a child of the sixties.

  • I'm a child of the sixties

  • I love to watch hockey, but hate to play it, while I love to play baseball but hate to watch it.

  • My penis has achieved conscious thought. And if you think I'm twisted, you should see the shit that guy comes up with.

  • I enjoy the occasional alcoholic beverage or ten.

  • I'm the one that turned cats and dogs against each other. Or maybe that was Grandpa Simpson...

  • Although I love all of gods creatures, I have to admit that Panda bears are starting to get on my nerves.

  • Haven't heard a Journey song that wasn't awesome.

  • Contrary to popular belief, there isn't someone out there for everyone. Some people are just shit out of luck.

  • I can compare apples to oranges just fine. Don't try and tell me otherwise.

Have I killed enough of your brain cells yet? I strive to be the literary equivalent to a nice tasty Thai stick. Let me know what you think.

Until next time....